Feature

They Make Us Wanna (Cry): On JLS’ Split

Today, some sad news reached our ears and yours. Kick-starters of the late-noughties boyband revival, JLS, are to call it a day. In pop, there’s bands that one is devastated when they call it quits (Girls Aloud, Mini Viva) and bands which one, quite frankly, couldn’t care less about and/or saw coming a mile away (Hear’Say, Liberty X, B*Witched etc.) Today’s news concerning JLS falls somewhere between these two extremities.

7 reasons we are upset that JLS are to call it quits:

1. They are the best looking boyband of the current UK boyband lot. Yes, Union J, this includes you too. There’s a reason JLS the brand became successful, and it has something to do with this [warning: may include shirtlessness]

2. Pop Royalty couple Rarvin (or Mochelle) will no longer be able to rule pop. With The Saturdays finally getting a deserved UK #1 single, the demise of previous rivals Girls Aloud and Sugababes, and a lack of new rival girlbands – Stooshe being the only example that spring to mind – The Saturdays are at last the premier girlband in the UK. As mentioned above, JLS are definitely the forefathers of boyband fever that has swept the UK in the last few years, and allowed The Wanted, One Direction and Union J to become established and commercially-viable acts. Therefore, there is no denying that Marvin and Rochelle between them ruled the UK pop scene in terms of both boybands AND girlbands. No more. Whatever Marvin goes on to do, his inclusion in early-noughties long-forgotten Simon-Webb managed Vs indicating that music is his life and his career rather than something fallen into by mistake, it is unlikely to be as successful or as culturally-changing as JLS.

3. The most successful X Factor alumni. As their press-release somewhat snarkily states, JLS are the only UK X Factor act to ‘successfully complete a 5 year recording contract.’ The wording of this seems carefully crafted, to hint at the fact that acts such as Alexandra Burke, Leona Lewis and Joe McElderry, whilst having recording careers as long as JLS resulting from the UK X Factor, have been shoved around onto different labels, normally as a result of being dropped from Syco. JLS really were the first actual winners of UK X Factor despite not winning – they have, bar One Direction, probably made the most money whilst maintaining the most chart success.

4. ‘Hottest Girl In The World’, their last lead single, came third on our ‘Best songs of 2012 list’. This shows that JLS still have a lot of potential as recording artists, and thus makes us sad that this potential will seemingly never be realised.

5. They have become part of the UK pop scene. Related to point numbers 2 and 3, JLS were the first X Factor act to properly integrate themselves onto the scene, lose sense of their reality-TV beginnings,and actually gain credibility as recording artists.

6. Their output (singles wise) is the best of any of the current UK boybands.

7. They made it alright to wear deep-Vs.

Need we remind you of some of JLS’ best songs, in chronological order? Oh, alright then… 

Beat Again: An epic chart smash and era-definer.
One Shot: Just an amazing song. Definitely our favourite by JLS.
The Club Is Alive: Half awful and half amazing.
Eyes Wide Shut: Very catchy.
She Makes Me Wanna: Excluding Dev, about 300% amazing.
Hottest Girl In The World: 500% amazing.

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