Following the success of our holiday playlist feature in summer comes our guide to the top Christmas tunes. As soon as December begins the same tired, old, and most alarmingly shit songs get pulled out every year. In order to combat this we bring you only the very best Christmas songs.
‘Christmas Tree’ comes from 2008, a time when Gaga was more concerned with making danceable and fun tunes than dressing provocatively, and other associated but ultimately distracting activities that ‘being’ Gaga has necessitated. Whilst likely intended as a novelty track, the track does have some underlying musical merit to back it up, namely its catchiness and delicious beats. Clearly it’s not the best thing that Gaga has ever released but it’s not awful either, which is basically a cautious ‘thumbs up’ from us.
But how will it score in the battle against our world famous popfoolish criteria…?
References to snow/winter/fire/cold in lyrics? A disappointing blank here from Gaga. She clearly hasn’t read the Christmas song rulebook re: ensuring the lyrics reference the weather. 0/10
Sleigh bells present? The sleigh bells start at 1:38, seemingly out of nowhere, which makes us appreciate them more than if we had been expecting them. 11/10
Other dodgy Christmas sound effects? 0/10
Christmas themed lyrics? There are plenty of ‘rum pum pum pum’s and ‘fa la la la’s. In addition to this there is much mention of ‘ho ho ho’, mistletoe, and a Christmas tree. That the Christmas tree Gaga refers to here is her ladygarden just makes the reference much more enjoyable. 20/10
RATING: Certainly a different take on Christmas, but what else would we expect from the one and only Gaga? We must also mention how much we enjoy the song’s closing ‘cherry cherry boom boom’. 31/40.
Ultimate Christmas Playlist
‘Christmas Tree’ – Lady Gaga ft. Space Cowboy – 31
‘Christmas Wrapping’ – The Front Bottoms – 29
‘I Hate Christmas Parties’ – Matthew Thiessen and the Earthquakes – 10