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Praise The Lloyd: Cher’s back at last

I'm BACK

I’m BACK

We’re not talking about Cher you crazy popfool, we’re talking about Cher Lloyd! Yes, every popfool’s favourite professional Cheryl Cole lookalike is back at last with a new song. Following the commercial and artistic disasters respectively of the Becky G featuring ‘Oath’ and the TI featuring ‘I Wish’, AND being dropped by UK record label Syco, some popfools may have lost all hope that Cher Lloyd would ever return to her rightful place near the top of the charts. It seems like an age ago that Malvern-hailing Cher released those most delightful pop tunes ‘Want U Back’ and ‘With Ur Love’ here in the UK, and ever since it has been all quiet on the Lloyd front. We actually were rather fond of ‘Oath’ for what it’s worth, although we imagine Becky G featuring on your single is enough to deter people from buying it, and for some reason it was never released in the UK. However, ‘I Wish’ really wasn’t good. In fact it was so not good that Cher’s sophomore album, named ‘Sorry I’m Late’, ironically got delayed, TWICE (so far.)

BUT PRAISE THE LLOYD. Cher is back with a brand new track and she’s on her own this time, in an emotional ballad that is inexplicably named ‘Sirens.’ Think of a less epic version of Scherzinger’s ‘Don’t Hold Your Breath’ and we reckon you’re there. We make the Scherzo reference not due to X Factor relations, but because both songs have quite a low register to start with and a chorus which needs a little belting. [Actually we just listened to ‘Don’t Hold Your Breath’ and of course ‘Sirens’ is nowhere near as good as said Scherzo smash, like literally nowhere near.] However, it is very pleasant indeed and that is good news for popfools. ‘Sirens’ sounds like it could be a Katy Perry ballad and we can really imagine it doing well on radio airplay, at least in the US. (Here in the UK it might need a donk and/or gloomwobble adding from The Wideboys to manage some airplay on Kiss.) It genuinely is quality pop and we are pleased for Cher because we truly feel the popworld just isn’t as popfoolish without cheeky chapess Cher on the radar.

crazy eyes cher

I SAID I’M BACK

Welcome back Cher.

Rating: 7/10 and the all-important popfools seal of approval

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